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After WLS: Goodbye Self-Loathing! Hello Self-Loving!
You won't believe what happened to me today! I was getting ready for work and saw myself naked in the full-length mirror and I didn't hate what I saw! I actually gave myself an unrehearsed slightly passive self-compliment "You don't look bad today." The reason this is monumental is because most of the time when I look in the mirror I do not like what I see and I give myself harsh criticism. I suppose after years of self-loathing that it is more comfortable to degrade my appearance than to appreciate it. Many patients report hyper-judging their bodies after weight loss; it seems the thinner we get the more judgmental we are of our bodies. These days I'm critical of thighs that seem a bit jiggly and some very unattractive cottage cheese dimples on my rear end. Loathing these body parts keeps me from appreciating a thin waist, toned arms or those curious collarbones that were in hiding for so many years. Body dysmorphic disorder is a mental image many victims of anorexia nervosa have that tells them they look fat, even when they are emaciated. Morbidly obese people and bariatric patients can suffer from body dysmorphia as well. One reader, ThereseD, posted this message regarding body perception: "Body Dysmorphia is REAL! Over five years after my open RNY gastric bypass and I got hit with it again just last night, when I was cleaning out my closet. My daughter commented that my new shirt, which I was so proudly placing at the front, was too big and needs to go in the "go" pile. I checked the label and sure enough, it said "Large". Following my revision surgery of April 18, 2005, I still have my bandages and I'm probably wearing a size 4 Petite . . . and still I put on a smart and stylish new top in a size that's just too big for me! Oops!" When we were morbidly obese our emotional coping mechanisms kicked in and many of us were able to convince ourselves we really weren't that big. It is emotionally kinder to avoid body criticism. The whole issue of obesity seems hopeless. In fact, many morbidly obese patients will say they see themselves normal sized. That is until rude moments remind them they are not normal sized: a skinny chair, a turnstile, a bathroom stall, a flight of stairs, a photograph. This false perception is a subconscious coping strategy to protect us from the brutal truth, the truth about how big morbidly obese really is. After surgery, there is a tendency for the body dysmorphia to reverse. Before surgery we denied how big we were, after surgery we judge ourselves critically - like the anorexic - and fail to see an honest reflection. One woman, down from size 24 to size 10 wrote, "I feel fat daily. I never felt this at 248 pounds - I saw a thinner person in the mirror than I see now. I look at my size 10 jeans and they look like tents. I don't feel as attractive as I did when I was heavy. I don't understand it," she continued, "but I think it has to do with learning to accept yourself fat so you didn't see all the fat. Now I just have to learn to accept myself as thinner." It has been suggested that dressing in stylish clothes that fit is one way to beat the body blues. Another idea, as Therese suggested, is having a bystander who will be honest about our appearance. Therese wrote, "My daughter's the number one person I go to, when I need to cure the myopic view of myself that I've developed." I wish I knew what magic happened this morning that I accepted and appreciated my own body. If I could package that magic I would personally mail it to every reader of LivingAfterWLS.com - we ALL deserve to love and appreciate ourselves. It's time for the self-loathing to end and the self-appreciation to begin. Kaye Bailey � 2005- All Rights Reserved Kaye Bailey is a weight loss surgery success story having maintained her health and goal weight for 5+ years. An award winning journalist, she is the author and webmaster of http://www.livingafterwls.com and http://www.livingafterwls.blogspot.com Fresh & insightful content is added daily, check in often. To subscribe to the LivingAfterWLS monthly newsletter "You Have Arrived" click on http://www.livingafterwls.com and enter your details in the subscription box.
MORE RESOURCES: Changing behavior to aid weight loss may be linked to reduced risks of obesity related cancers Medical Xpress Grand Forks woman 30 pounds into 100-pound weight loss goal with Sanford Sports program Valley News Live Why your health plan doesn’t cover GLP-1s, according to a top insurance exec The Washington Post GLP-1 Weight-Loss Drug Demonstration Begins July 2026 Medicare Rights Center Cyclosporiasis Outbreak 2026 Johns Hopkins Medicine Atlanta doctors discuss the pros and cons of taking a GLP-1 for weight management Rough Draft Atlanta This Method May Rival Calorie-Counting for Weight Loss—and Require Less Mental Effort - Yahoo Health Internet searches on weight-loss medications have increased 25-fold since the launch of GLP-1 drugs Medical Xpress Grand Forks woman 30 pounds into 100-pound weight loss goal with Sanford Sports program Valley News Live Lose sleep, gain weight: how chronic sleep loss can add 0.5kg every 6 weeks South China Morning Post 'Sopranos' Star Joe Gannascoli Reveals Incredible 150-Pound Weight Loss Ahead of New TV Role Yahoo Lifestyle Canada Study finds obesity 'fuels' leukemia, but a combo using popular weight-loss drugs may stop it Medical Xpress GLP-1 Use Hits Record High As Medicare Opens Access To Weight-Loss Drugs Optometry Advisor 'Squash' weight loss excuses with help from GBMC's Comprehensive Obesity Management Program WMAR 2 News Baltimore In U.S., GLP-1 Usage Reaches New High Gallup News 30-Day High-Protein Diabetes-Friendly Meal Plan for Weight Loss, Created by a Dietitian - EatingWell Lizzo answers her critics: ‘I’m a fat, black, happy girl – they were always going to try to tear me down’ The Guardian More Americans Than Ever Are Taking Weight-Loss Drugs The New York Times Mindy Kaling flaunts her itty-bitty waist in stunning new appearance after 40lbs weight loss - Yahoo Fractyl Health Reports Positive One-Year REMAIN-1 Midpoint Cohort Results for Revita Weight Maintenance System Quiver Quantitative More U.S. adults are using GLP-1 drugs for weight loss Spectrum News 'Squash' weight loss excuses with help from GBMC's Comprehensive Obesity Management Program WMAR 2 News Baltimore Obesity drugs are more available than ever, but weight stigma is still an issue Association of Health Care Journalists Fractyl Health Reports Positive Randomized Data from GlobeNewswire Join Trial Testing New Drug for Weight Management Making Sense of Diabetes Just 12 weeks of intermittent fasting may help sustain weight loss a year later: study Medical News Today Weight loss from obesity drugs may not lead to broader health benefits Medical News Today Dr Reddy’s runs into trouble with its weight-loss drug Financial Times A Weight-Loss Revolution Is Reshaping Bodies. This Preclinical Biotech Wants to Build What Comes Next marketscreener.com Loni Love Celebrates a Year of ‘Becoming the Best Version of Myself’ amid Weight Loss Journey People.com Medicare access boosts local demand for weight-loss drugs TelegraphHerald.com Weight loss drugs don't work for everyone—here’s why Scientific American Is There More to the "Ozempic Salad" Than Just Hype? Yahoo Life UK Haian PVC Sauna Suit - Unisex Sweat Suit For Weight Loss & Exercise, Elastic Waist & Ankles umlconnector.com Cancer-Associated Weight Loss Is Driven by Hijacked Nerve Signaling and Worsened by Diet Technology Networks The GLP-1 disclosure dilemma: Should you tell a date you’re using Ozempic for weight loss? The Conversation Canadian employers expanding GLP-1 coverage for weight loss: survey Benefits Canada.com 61 surprising ways weight-loss drugs can change your body BBC Science Focus Magazine |
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